Season 4 Episode 3

Posted by Rope Squirrel | Posted in Advice, Interview, Podcast, Product Review, Rope Squirrel | Posted on 23-06-2017

Tags: , , , , , ,

0

Play

Season 4 Episode 3

Firstly, I speak about how to build a scene. I go over some of the tricks I’ve learned and ways to make sure a scene goes smoothly.


I also get the pleasure of reviewing a product I purchased. A Behindbarz Chastity belt.

Note: They gave me a discount code if any of you would like to purchase one. Just use the promo code: RopeSquirrel50 and get £50 off (USD Conversion)

Full disclosure: BehindBarz did give me a slight discount on a belt, but there was no non-disparagement agreement. My opinions are my own and were not influenced by receiving a discount.

Introduction:

I was first introduced to this brand at Spanksgiving 2016. I was teaching a class on chastity and one of the audience members showed me his belt (with his keyholder’s permission of course 🙂 ). I fell in love with the belt. It looked so secure and the one issue I’d been having with belts is that I didn’t feel secure. I have some skill at lock picking and some of my previous models did not withstand my attempts. The only solution was the plastic locks but I liked the look of metal locks. To me, a scene isn’t complete if I feel that I can escape whenever I want. So I wanted a belt that made me truly feel helpless.

I reached out to Behindbarz and was very impressed with their product. They also allowed a significant amount of customization and that was really appreciated. For example, I requested mine in purple (and ordered matching cuffs from another person) and even had bondage attachment points put on the side of it. I elected for the Hanibal 1 model which only partially encloses the genitals to facilitate long term wear (at the advice of the Behindbarz staff.

Opening the box:

The belt was shipped quickly and arrived wrapped all pretty. I was really impressed with the presentation of the belt. I even got a laugh at the customs paperwork (it did ship from the UK) where it said the contents of the box was a metal sculpture. Still, opening the box was a treat and I rather enjoyed the experience. Because the order was rushed to get it to me in time for a presentation at Colorado LeatherFest, it is possible that one thing was overlooked. No instructions were included in mine. Being a tech guy by trade a rarely read instructions unless I have questions, but the wonderful staff was responsive to my questions via emails. I am sure that if I have any further questions, they would be happy to answer them for me.

Putting it on:

Putting the belt on was fairly straight forward. Initially, as it is with most belts, it takes some adjusting and getting used to. However, this involves bending and putting it on and seeing where it pinches. It did take a few weeks of work (though I could have done it quicker) but it is reasonable comfortable. The belt features twin cylinder key locks and I have yet to figure out how to pick those. I’ve found that wearing the “locking athletic cup” can sometimes protrude from khaki dress pants (which I wear every day). In order to avoid it being seen, I wear track pants and that seems to do the trick. However, to wear it to work, I simply have the front plate removed and then it’s fairly inconspicuous and yet fairly effective.  It takes a lot of bending before I got it comfortable, but now it’s hardly noticeable.

Overall impressions:

I really do like the product overall. It took some work to get a good fit, but in the end, it is effective. There is one area that it didn’t pass. Using a vibrator, I was able to achieve an orgasm, however, I am accustomed to vibrators and was rather aroused at the time. It wasn’t a very good orgasm, but it was possible, and I think I am in the minority of men (though I could be wrong) that uses a vibrator. However, I have yet to find a belt or cage that can prevent me from doing so. It certainly prevents sex and does it well. There really isn’t much chance of that happening. I originally thought that a more covered Hannibal model might solve the problem, but the way I achieved it was simply to vibrate the Hannibal itself so I don’t think more coverage would have hindered me.

As with all belts, you can’t really use a urinal and this in and of itself can take some getting used to. It is possible to use a urinal, but you might end up peeing on your shoes and who wants that? Use a stall. It’s the best way. There is minimal drippage afterward and a piece of toilet paper usually takes care of that effectively. Don’t forget to though or you might have a surprise in your pants later. I’ve also found that wearing underwear is not very comfortable so going commando, at least for me is ideal.

Can I get the thing off? Nope! Not without metal cutters. It is VERY secure. I truly feel helpless when I am locked in the device. I have tried to pick the lock, but so far, with no avail.

One thing I’ve actually found is that, with the Hannibal cup in place, you are fairly well armored. Actually had someone accidentally hit me in the groin (they were playing a VR game and I was walking near them) and let’s just say that I appreciated being armored. Didn’t even feel it.

Photos of me in belt

(coming soon)

Where can you get one?

The only place that I know if is their website:

http://www.behindbarz.co.uk

Be sure to use my promo code.  RopeSquirrel50 to get £50 off (USD Conversion)

 

As promised, here is the recipe for the evil hot sauce popsicle:

Season 4 Episode 3 | Hot Sauce Popsicles.

First step:  Get an ice cube tray.
Second step:  Mix hot sauce and V8.
Last step:  Freeze for 1 1/2 days.

 


However, that is not all, I also get to speak with the people responsible for the product! I’m so happy. The interview is in this week’s episode. I speak with Joe from BehindBarz.


Finally, as we always do, we answer your questions. This week:

  • David in Illinois – I think I have control issues. The idea of chastity really does turn me on (so much so that sometimes when the belt or cage comes out I get hard and can’t put it on) but when I do put it on and the keys get taken away, I’m ok at first, but then I start to get angry and upset. I really don’t know why I feel this way. I think though it might stem from being out of control. Do you have any tips to overcome this?
  • Kendra in Washington – I’ve never been a keyholder before. My female partner wanted to be locked up and have control taken away from her. I’m nothing if not a pleaser, but now I’m not sure what to do? Can you give me an idea of some activities?
  • Charles in Maine – I can’t sleep in my belt. No matter how much I adjust it I do wake up in discomfort most nights. I am currently using a belt style of chastity belt. Would I have better luck with a cage or something? Cages seem to not fit me very well either. If I make the belt too tight it’s more comfortable at first, but then not. If I make it loose, it is just uncomfortable. How can I improve the fit of my belt to make it more comfortable?

I do realize these questions are chastity heavy, but I figured they suited the guests this week.

 

Season 4 Episode 1

Posted by Rope Squirrel | Posted in Advice, Interview, Opinion, Podcast, Rope Squirrel | Posted on 20-01-2017

Tags: , , , , ,

0

Play

Season 4 Episode 1

2016 turns into 2017

It’s 2017! A new year, time for a new season. Let’s start it off with a bang. I talk about community leaders. This is a topic that is quite dear to my heart.

Questions this week:

This time I have two individuals from StockingsVR.com, Angel Wicky and Julia Allen who BOTH help me answer your questions

Angel WickyStockingsVR logo

1) Ashton in Kansas – I’m really into chastity. Honestly, it’s all I seem to think about. I’m just not sure where to start. I want to be locked up and taken control of. I want to be at the mercy of someone else. However, when I’ve tried it in the past, people are just too scared and just let me out when I ask, which is specifically what I don’t want. How can I get someone to help me to achieve what I am looking for in a keyholder?

2) Benny in Maine – No matter how hard I try, I can’t seem to find a permanent relationship. Play partners end up being just a one-night thing and then never happen again. Can you give me any tips to meeting people? What might I be doing wrong?

3) Kendra in Ohio – I’ve always had a hard time trusting people. In fact, it has ruined several of my relationships in the past. However, while I acknowledge this, is it too much to ask for some leeway when it comes to my relationships? A period of time where I can get to trust someone before they demand it from me? Most of the relationships I have seem to think this is an unreasonable demand and it drives me crazy. What can I do?

Season 3 Episode 5

Posted by Rope Squirrel | Posted in Advice, Interview, Opinion, Podcast, Rope Squirrel | Posted on 04-10-2016

Tags: , , , ,

0

Play

Season 3 Episode 5

Season 3 Episode 5 | leeharrington1

This week, we talk about a variety of topics. The first is something I call ostriching or people running away from the problem. However, on the lighter side, we talk with Lee Harrington about his new book Traversing Gender: Understanding Transgender Realities

As always, we answer your questions:

1) Tony in Colorado. Recently, at my office, a co-worker came out as transgender. Being active
in the kink community, I couldn’t be more supportive. The thing is, my support comes from my kink
community. I know that being a transgender person doesn’t equate with being kinky but alternative
lifestyles and transgender individuals are both somewhat disenfranchised. Should I come out to her
and be supportive?
2) Alicia in Vermont. I am a transgender individual. Before I came out, I was terrified to go to
any BDSM events in general. Now I am even more afraid. What can I expect when I attend a BDSM event?
Will I be welcomed? Is there anything I should do to prepare beforehand?
3) Ben in Connecticut. I am recently out of a long term relationship. Single and ready for
action. My question is, I have been being approached by people who are quite a bit younger than me. I
am 40, they are 24. I have no problems interacting with people who are younger, but I worry about the
stigma in the vanilla world of dating someone much younger. I usually try and stay above my age or
below my age by only 5 years. I do enjoy playing with her, but am I going to be in trouble later?

 

 

Sorry again for the long break. I had a lot of things going on in my local community and very little time to do anything. However, more episodes are incoming so keep those feeds dialed and stay tuned!

Season 3 Episode 3

Posted by Rope Squirrel | Posted in Advice, Interview, Opinion, Podcast, Rope Squirrel | Posted on 25-05-2016

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

0

Play

Season 3 Episode 3
Season 3 Episode 3 | Tony and Christie

This week, we talk about expectations, and the scene in general. Expectations are a difficult thing to both have and for venue and other organizers to meet if they are set too high. Not saying you shouldn’t have high expectations, but if it’s your first time, at least be reasonable.

We also have a wonderful interview with two presenters that I met in Las Vegas, Tony the Grey and Christie. They are presenters from the Southeast US and I will be seeing them again at an upcoming conference. Looking forward to it!

Their website: http://www.tonythegrey.com/

 

Aggregate questions for this week:

1. How do I get over a BDSM relationship in which we continue to see each other at various venues?
2. How do I establish credibility in the scene?
3. How do I mitigate top drop?

Season 3 Episode 2

Posted by Rope Squirrel | Posted in Advice, Interview, Podcast, Rope Squirrel | Posted on 28-04-2016

Tags: , , , , ,

0

Play

Season 3 Episode 2

Season 3 Episode 2 | Gender Negotiations

This time, we discuss negotiations, we speak with Lee Harrington about his latest book, and we answer your questions

Season 3 Episode 2 | Lee Harrington

Find Lee’s book here:


Your questions:

  • My significant other and I have been experimenting with light BDSM (Dom/sub, and light bondage), and have really been enjoying it. What are some nicknames/titles we can use that won’t come across as inappropriate or alarming outside of the bedroom. We would like to maintain our Dom/sub roles in our daily lives, without making others uncomfortable. We have even found a collar for me that looks like a necklace. Thank you.”. Bridget in North Carolina
  • I’m about to attend a BDSM event for the first time. However, I feel that I am lacking in the BDSM leather wear department. Where can I get some inexpensive leather clothing so I fit in? – Ben in Nashville TN
  • I’ve played with numerous people in the scene, but, when I do, there just doesn’t seem to be any passion. Don’t get me wrong I have a great time, and they seem to be having an amazing time, but I just don’t seem to enjoy it as much as they do. My heart just isn’t in it. How do I establish a connection with people even if it is just for a short time? Ann in California

Season 3 Episode 1

Posted by Rope Squirrel | Posted in Advice, Opinion, Podcast, Rope Squirrel | Posted on 31-03-2016

Tags: , , , ,

0

Play
003-fact-and-fiction-1024x682[1]
This week, I wanted to talk about misconceptions in the scene. When we first start off, there are a variety of things we think we are going to see. In the end, it just isn’t so. Also, welcome to Season 3. Sorry it took so long. Had a variety of factors not including a site breach. However, we are returning to our normal schedule.
Viewer Questions this week:
  • I’d really like to get into presenting. I feel that I have a lot to offer the BDSM community. How can I get into this field?
  • I go to parties all the time but never end up playing. I just can’t seem to find anyone to play with. How to do it?
  • How do I know someone is safe / how do I find safe people to play with / how do I be safe?

 

Music this week:
Techno Turtle feat. Martijn de Boer (NiGiD) by Levihica (c) 2015 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution Noncommercial (3.0) license. Ft: Martijn de Boer (NiGiD)

Season 2 Episode 16

Posted by Rope Squirrel | Posted in Advice, Opinion, Podcast, Rope Squirrel | Posted on 18-12-2015

Tags: , , , , ,

0

Play

Season 2 Episode 16 | 2015 to 2016 Transition

Well.. it is finally here! The last episode of 2015. This week I just don’t have time to get to the questions, but… I do cover vanilla perceptions of our kinky world. This will be my last episode of 2015. I shall return in early 2016 with more interviews and more kinkiness. So stay tuned and we’ll see you on the other side! The kink must continue!

Season 2 Episode 16 | BDSM in the new year

 

Music for this week:

Parallel World by Platinum Butterfly (c) 2015 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution Noncommercial (3.0) license.

Season 2 Episode 14

Posted by Rope Squirrel | Posted in Advice, Podcast, Rope Squirrel | Posted on 04-11-2015

Tags: , , , , ,

1

Play

Season 2 Episode 14

Season 2 Episode 14

This week, I discuss a the differences between play relationships and relationships, I read a listener comment from the last show, and I answer the questions below:

  • I’m brand new to the community and the lifestyle. What are some things that I can do so that people take me seriously? What are some pitfalls I should avoid?
  • I am traveling to another place far away from my normal scene. How can I get involved withe local community and not feel like an outsider? Should I even bother?
  • Where is a good place to get toys?

 

The song I used is this:

Universe of Music by snowflake (c) 2014 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution Noncommercial (3.0) license. Ft: CSoul, Copperhead

Season 2 Episode 13

Posted by Rope Squirrel | Posted in Advice, Announcements, Opinion, Podcast, Rope Squirrel | Posted on 22-10-2015

Tags: , , , , ,

0

Play

Season 2 Episode 13

Season 2 Episode 13 | Shy personThis week we have several topics to tackle. The biggest however is what constitutes normal in the kink scene. We reference a post on Fetlife, however, for privacy, we won’t be linking directly to it (plus it’s been taken down).

 

  • My Boyfriend is into lactation, he wants to get me pregnant so that he can indulge in that fantasy. I think it’s sick and wrong. Can’t I find someone who is just “normal”?
  • When new people enter the community, one of the first things they need is guidance and safe friends. Is it possible to relate with people who are just coming into the community when you’ve been in it for a while?
  • My girlfriend really wants to put me into chastity. I’m not really sure about it though. Are there any risks associated with long term chastity?

 

Announcement, Rope_Squirrel, in his alter ego, will be presenting at Sin in the City 2016. However, that means there may be some opportunity for interviews in Vegas.

Season 2 Episode 10

Posted by Rope Squirrel | Posted in Advice, Interview, Opinion, Podcast, Rope Squirrel | Posted on 03-09-2015

Tags: , , , , ,

0

Play

Season 2 Episode 10

Season 2 Episode 10 | Romeo and Juliet, the tale of two clubs

This episode features an interview with a Detroit munch organizer and community leader, I talk about bridging gaps between groups and we answer questions about collars, strange fetishes and negotiations.

Creative Commons License
This work by the Kink in the Chain Podcast is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License.